Nonetheless, I decided to look back at the ancient world to see what it teaches us about the roots of fandom wank in all its flavours, and I found the following fascinating factlet in Wikipedia's entry on Socrates:
The only evidence of his existence is references to him by his purported disciples, leading some to question whether he ever existed at all, supported by Plato's flawed description of his death by poison, and the way all references to him functioned as a sort of rhetorical device including Plato, as an appeal to authority, giving their arguments the appearance of support by a Great Teacher.
Yes, the great philosopher Socrates may in fact have been Sockrates, the first sockpuppet! (Sadly all traces of his original IP address were destroyed during the Peloponnesian War, so we can't be certain.)
Next time on "Mighty Moments from Wank History": how Julius Caesar was stabbed by conspirators jealous of his Big Name Roman status and how his last words were not "Et tu, Brute?" but "OMGWTFBBQ?!?!?!"...