Red Scharlach (redscharlach) wrote,
Red Scharlach

Mwah Mwah, Ding Dong

So, did everyone watch tonight's Match of the Day? Below the cut is my play-by-play analysis of Manchester City v. West Ham... oops, that's not what I meant to type, is it.

Yes, this post is about Torchwood, of course. Assorted thoughts on Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang follow:

  • Paging Sir David Attenborough, but that's NOT a blowfish. It's a lionfish, surely? Then again, perhaps it's just a red herring...

  • I was amused by the fact that Mr Lionfish had clearly watched the first series and made his own character development notes. Shame his blogging days must be over now, after Jack's rather stinging critique to the head.

  • And now, let's all stand in the Hub and handwave madly so we don't notice the massively vague continuity jump between Doctor Who and this! I'm actually surprised they mentioned as much as they did. "Are you going back to him?" Oh, Ianto, bless you.

  • Perhaps naively, I had assumed that James Marsters would be speaking American in this. But no, he's speaking fluent Spoike (TM). Perhaps they feared no one would recognize him without the accent? Perhaps they thought "hey, we've paid for Spike, let's have Spike!". What the heck, give the public what they know.

  • Who hasn't dreamed of waltzing into a pub and telling everyone who isn't fit enough to get lost? The only problem is, I'm so picky that once I'd weeded out the less-than-impressive, I'd probably find myself alone with twelve bottles of gin and some crisps. Although that might not be such a bad thing.

  • It's PC Andy! Hooray for continuity! And still being ignored by Gwen, poor lad.

  • "Whoa, that never beeps." Well, Ianto would know, bless him. Also, cheesy Obi-Wan Kenobi shout-out from John, but what the heck: I guess we were all thinking it anyway. Plus, added kudos for including the little head turn! It's also undeniable proof that when the Time Agency weren't shagging, drinking, snorting stuff and murdering each other, they were having retro sci-fi video nights....

  • Despite the fact that I had mostly avoided spoilers, I had not managed to avoid seeing pictures of The Snog (oh, you impatient iconeers!), so I knew it was coming. I think it might have been hotter if a) I hadn't been expecting it, and b) that wasn't all there was. Still, it was better than a slap in the face with a dead blowfish, AND it acted as a one-way ticket to Innuendoville for the rest of the episode, which can't be bad.

  • "It is more fun when he's around, though." Once again, Ianto pet, you would know...

  • Jack having a drink makes me wonder whether they're ever going to explain his usual preference for water? It's clearly meant to be a thing, isn't it. Or at least, it WAS a thing. Let's see whether it still is.

  • Predictably, much love for the Jack-n-John banter. Highlights were probably "I bet the ranks were very grateful", "This is the entrance for tourists" / "I remember the last time you said that," and of course, the size-of-my-wriststrap gags. Wriststraps are the new bananas, FACT. Also, they spent the equivalent of five years together and didn't kill each other? Now there's a sitcom spin-off I want to see.

  • Hooray for Tosh, whose single-girl hormones now clearly outweigh any sense of self-preservation or what constitutes an appropriate time to flirt or an appropriate person to do it with. (I know the feeling, love.) Still, John took a shine to her too, which is good. She can mentally add him to her list of Mad Serial Killers Who Genuinely Liked Me For Myself.

  • Relationship notes:
    a) Jack, you do realize you could have had Gwen at any point (and still could) if you just grabbed her and shoved your tongue in? Hell, it worked for Owen, it'll work for anyone!
    b) Gwen, tell Rhys to STOP PHONING YOU AT WORK. It's getting silly now. Would you let him do it if you were in the S.A.S.? Oh, come to think of it, you probably would.
    c) So Owen needs a proper woman now, does he? Has he explained what she's going to get out of the bargain? Bets are now on as to whether Tosh should get her hopes up, or whether Martha is waiting in the wings with her standards ready to drop...
    d) Blimey, Jack actually asked Ianto out on a date. And he actually said yes, and got all adorably awkward about it. BLESS. Oh dear, I definitely pulled an obscenely fangirlie face here, and it's probably still on my face. I can't help it, I'm just a pathetic sap when it comes to Ianto, and want nice things to happen to him for a change. Oh Jack, don't you go breaking his heart now, just because your ego is a bit bruised.

  • The bomb-thingy that latched onto John reminded me of the Cronos device, if you've seen that movie. (And if you haven't, it's recommended.)

  • And please welcome our special guest, the Stopwatch! Ianto's delight at getting to manhandle it in public AND bad things happening to Captain Vera was all too apparent.

  • Slightly dull-but-true fact: I realized that this must have been the episode that was being shot when John Barrowman was on the Friday Night Project and Alan and Justin visited the Hub set: the snatch of filming that they showed was Captain John threatening to shoot Gwen and everyone scuttling around.

  • Face it, John. Jack's wrist-strap is bigger. Jack's everything is bigger.

  • "I've found Gray", was it? Crikey, something else for Jack to pull his patented Angst!face (TM) over. And he was doing so well at staying cheerful too. But hey, if it tosses the chance of some Jack backstory into the mix, it's got my interest piqued.

  • To sum up, this may not have been hardhitting social drama for the 21st century, but it was probably more fun than I have had for months. I'm enjoying the chirpy, tongue-in-cheek tone, and as long as things keep clipping along in a similarly entertaining way, with everyone getting screentime and flirting-with-Jack rights (especially sweetheart tea-boys, BLESS THEM), I am looking forward to whatever the next twelve doses of delirium may hold.

By the way, I deliberately didn't watch the season 2 preview that followed the episode, so please don't mention stuff from it. However, I strongly suspect that this is not the last we will see of Captain Spike John Vera....
Tags: torchwood
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