Red Scharlach (redscharlach) wrote,
Red Scharlach
redscharlach

Who's next?

As you may already know, for this year's Children in Need charity telethon, the BBC showed the first two minutes of the forthcoming Doctor Who Christmas special. If you sensibly chose to go the pub and didn't see it, or if you are geographically challenged and therefore can't watch it online, you may be vaguely interested to know what you missed.

It went something like this. Well, give or take a little artistic paraphrasing on my part, hem hem:

The TARDIS arrives in some fake snow. The TENTH DOCTOR steps out.

TENTH DOCTOR:
Tell me, scenic street urchin, is this the set of a new BBC costume drama, or am I trapped in a tin of Quality Street?

URCHIN:
It's 1851, innit. Hey, wotchu doing 'ere, guv'nor? I thought you woz leavin' the show? It said so in The Sun and everyfing!

TENTH DOCTOR:
Not until next year, idiot. Didn't you read the press release properly?

YELLING NOISE:
Doctor!!!!!!!!11111eleventy-one!!!

TENTH DOCTOR:
Donna, is that you??

It's not Donna, it's a girl in a corset called ROSITA. (Funny name for a corset, boom boom.)

ROSITA:
Doctor!!! I am being shrill in a Cockney accent and I have my bosoms pushed up to my ears!

TENTH DOCTOR:
Well, I like at least one of those things, so I think we're going to get along famously.

ROSITA:
Beat it, loser. Ah, here comes my man!

"NEXT" DOCTOR:
Yes, 'tis I! I am doing lots of SHOUTING and sound like a cross between Russ Abbot and Lord Flashheart!

TENTH DOCTOR:
You're not going to do that for the whole of the Christmas episode, are you?

"NEXT" DOCTOR:
I shall if I want to! Firstly because I'm the Doctor, and secondly because ham is traditional at Christmas!

TENTH DOCTOR:
Are you going to be this bombastic when we have sex?

"NEXT" DOCTOR:
Pardon me?

TENTH DOCTOR:
Oh, don't play coy with me, big boy. Phallic symbols at the ready? Allons-y!

Rosita buys popcorn and watches with interest.

THE END
(FOR NOW)


Don't forget to give to Children in Need, folks...
Tags: doctor who
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 26 comments
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →