Red Scharlach (redscharlach) wrote,
Red Scharlach

It's a pneumatically knickered One-Question Quiz!

In the absence of any proper fannish posts from me (I'm still scribbling away, honest), here's a startling visual bonbon from one of my regular trawls through the fascinating online annals of LIFE magazine.

But what on earth is it? Well, readers, that's for you to decide...

You mock now, but we'll all be dressing like this in the year 3011.

Poll #1667014 The Air-Down-There Quiz

What the blithering heck is this?

A) This is one hot piece of inflatable ass.
B) This is a stylish and convenient way to become impervious to hard kicks in the groin.
C) This is proof that incontinence issues and disco-dancing are not mutually exclusive.
E) This is a rejected design for the Eleventh Doctor's costume (apparently the sandals gave him blisters).
F) This is the most astounding experience in rapid slenderizing you have ever known.
G) This is just a flimsy excuse for TICKY BOXES, isn't it?

Desperate to know the answer? Well, I can reveal that the correct response is F (and a bit of G, I must admit). And the full and grisly truth can be seen in more detail below:

Trim-Jeans: they're not trim and they're not jeans either.

Yes, if this advertisement from January 1971 is to be believed, "this super product is producing super new slenderizing for a host of men and women." If challenged, I would guess that a "host" in this context means "five, but we made up at least three of them", and that "super new slenderizing" is a euphemism for "sweating like a genetically modified pig in a tropical heatwave". Delightful, isn't it? I also love the repeated use of the term "space-age" to mean "shiny and ridiculous".

Trim-Jeans may be neither trim, nor jeans, but at least they are egalitarian, since they look equally stupid on men AND women. However, the choice to pair them with a nipple-revealing fishnet T-shirt is one that only "Gary Coover" (if that IS his real name) can explain, and with that stoic expression, I'm betting that he's never going to tell...
Tags: fashion and style, quiz
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